Living More Consciously

So I want to tell you about this really amazing thing that happened to me.

I have been reading a lot lately about synchronicity or synchrodestiny, as Julia Cameron calls it. The idea is that when you become more aware and mindful within the universe, you begin to notice wonderful things befalling you. Chopra, for example, tells us to pay close attention to so-called coincidences. He states that once you begin to pay attention to these events or triggers you will soon realize that they are not coincidences at all but rather the universe handing you what you need or want, events which we create simply through your own mindfulness. If this line of thinking is true (and there is plenty of evidence to say that it is) it means that as humans we are truly capable of achieving anything our hearts can dream up. And that's pretty damn terrifying. Because it means of course that if you are not happy with you job, your love life, your health and wellness, it's pretty much your own fault.

This is not really new news, books like The Secret have been telling us this for a long time. It's just a hard pill to swallow. It means that we must, for a second, step outside our social conditioning and accept that yes, the matrix is real, and no, it need not control us. I admit, I was skeptical at first too. Week after week in,y Artists Way workbook, Julia would ask me if I had experienced any examples of synchrodestiny yet, and week after week I could honestly say I hadn't. But i am beginning to think that my mind was just too closed off to it. And then something really interesting happened. I was reading an article about abundance and meditation which suggested you spend twenty minutes a day for seven days in a row meditating about something that made you extremely happy, that you wanted for your life. It could pertain to your job, your social life, family, anything, but you had to make your visualization as specific as possible and see it happening now, and not in the future. So I decided to try this. I found twenty minutes was a little too long for me, despite what the article stated, so after the first day I switched to ten minutes with a five minute snooze set on my alarm. I easily did the fifteen minutes. The first day I did the meditation I focused on my personal relationships and social life. I envisioned myself with a loving man and lots of warm, wonderful friends. I saw us laughing together, preparing meals together. I envisioned a happy home. And I envisioned it all happening NOW, which is a little scary, considering I wasn't even seriously dating.

The next day was Dec. 14th, the day of the terrible school tragedy in Sandy Hook, Connecticut. When I woke up and read the news I was bewildered and devastated. In my shocked state I gathered my writing materials and began the two mile trek to the ocean. I wasn't sure what would happen when I got there, but writing and the ocean have always cultivated a deep sense of peace and healing in me so i knew where i needed to go and what to do. But I never made it to the ocean. Along my walk I passed a handsome man around my age (who looked just as disheveled as myself). I said hello absent-mindedly and went on my way. A few minutes later I saw him again, and this time the connection was so strong and overpowering for us both that we began to carry on a conversation (from across a busy street). I spent the next few hours getting to know that man, both of us feeling as though we had known each other forever. A couple hours later I took him to the airport with a friend of his and wound up sharing wonderful conversation, beers, and my next three meals with this friend. Since then I have been in close touch with both men, one as a romantic interest and the other as a friend. I can't say yet where these events will lead, and I am not trying to think about any of that just yet. But I can't help but wonder how much my meditation had to do with these unexpected windfalls.

Here's one more example, in case you are still a little skeptical. Over the past week I have begun to more seriously look for a job. I was on Craigslist and found a position for a personal assistant that seemed like a good lead. I immediately applied for the position. I also made plans to visit another company the next day for a party staffing position. Then I did my meditation. I envisioned interviewing for the personal assistant job. I envisioned all the details of being offered the position, right down to what my desk looked like. Feeling refreshed and hopeful, I went to bed.

Guess what happened. Do you think I was offered the personal assistant position? Nope. Not even an interview. However, I went to the group interview for the party staffing and was offered a job, and a gig, on the spot. It's not my ideal work and it might be only temporary, but it's good pay for the gig with potential for future opportunities, and takes care of making New Year's Eve plans, a day I traditionally both dread and despise. So I can't help but think that the meditation played a part in both these occurrences, and that is pretty hopeful.

Apply mindfulness practice to the idea of abundance, and suddenly it seems as though opportunities abound. We have been told all of our lives that there is scarcity: scarcity of jobs, of money, of love. Is this true? Or is it just manipulation of fear? Am I afraid of getting hurt again by love, or of not getting a job or being able to pay my rent? Of course I am. But we must act in the face of fear. We must have courage. Courage is a funny thing. I tend to think about it in terms of heroes; people who faced great consequences and carried on. People like Harriet Tubman or Anne Frank. But if I am to separate courage from myself as this epic thing for heroes, well once again it takes the responsibility off myself to live my life courageously. And here's a fact: it takes an enormous amount of courage to choose to live differently than those around me have prescribed, to break the mold of expectation, to be afraid of failing and of falling, and yet to carry on. All my life people have told me that I am brave; moving far away from my family for school, moving to NYC at 22, leaving a marriage that was broken, believing in my profession even when others would have abandoned it. Coming here and then everything that happened in the wake of that decision. But to be honest, I have never felt brave. In each situation I did what I had to do to survive, and I can think of just as many situations where I acted cowardly. Some of these situations are even one and the same. Courage is a perception. To some, moving away was courageous. To me it was an escape. Courage is about testing your own boundaries, breaking your own habits, choosing your own destiny. What I am trying to say is it takes courage to live your life more mindfully. It takes courage to step outside the traditional lines of belief of what you 'should' be doing. It takes courage to share my process with you knowing that people will judge me. Yes, it is scary. Go ahead. Be afraid. Be awake. And act anyway. That is true courage.




Somewhat unrelated side note: last night I watched the movie Vegucated. It's about three people who go vegan for six weeks. I have been a vegetarian off and on for a number of years since I was a child. These days I follow a slightly altered policy: I *try* to eat a plant-based diet, and only eat meat that is local and organic. Except fish. I LOVE sushi. So I cheat with fish. I do partially vegan (no cow's milk) but I do eat cheese, butter, yogurt, eggs, and ice cream on occasion. I also have leather shoes that are my prized possession. So why am I telling you this? By now, unless you have been consciously living under a rock, you have probably gotten wind of the horrors that occur in slaughter houses and the disgusting conditions. That's the reason I first went veg in the first place. But watching this movie brought to light some things I hadn't considered. This is one of those situations where once you know that facts it feels incredibly irresponsible and hypocritical not to change your ways. So here, in brief, are some things i learned last night: As you might imagine, the conditions that animals are slaughtered under, milked, and forced to lay are simply put, atrocious. Imagine it as bad as you can possibly think of, and then imagine it ten times worse. The animals endure fear and pain and are not given anesthesia or medicine if they are ill because veterinary expenses would be too high. These animals suffer. Think of your cat or dog enduring the life and death that a typical raised-for-consumption animal endures. Is it really any different? And unfortunately your small local farm is probably participating in these same practices to keep up with the big guys and avoid their costs being even higher than they already are. Second, consuming animals at the rate we are currently is killing our planet. Very, very quickly. From deforestation to animal waste, to CO2 levels, we are hurting the planet at an alarming rate. Third, and perhaps saddest of all for me: if fishing rates continue at the rate they are now, by 2050 we will have completely depleted our oceans. 25% of animals pulled from the ocean are not target species and are therefore unnecessarily killed and then simply thrown back into the ocean. How tragic is that? Finally, overwhelming research shows that a plant-based diet significantly reduces diseases such as cancer and heart disease. But eating vegan does not mean eating only pastas and breads. That's not going to do anything good for your health, and in fact processed foods (such as pastas) are actually the enemy here. Plant-based is key here.

Ok, so this is what I am going to do. I am going to finish up all the animal products I have in the house (eggs, butter, and some delicious artisan cheese) and I am going to enjoy a few days of delicious meat and fish and cheese consumption with my new friends. And then I am going to do my own experiment by going vegan for six weeks. No, I will not be disposing of my beloved leather boots, but I will eat only non-animal products for six weeks and blog about my experience. There. I've said it in writing. Now I have to stick to it. But it seems to me a logical step in my goal of a more conscious lifestyle. Yes, ignorance is bliss, but consciousness feels oh so much better.

Happy living!